10 Things I Wish I Knew Before Becoming a Mother

Do I really have to limit this list to just 10 things? There are a million things I wish I would have known before God blessed me with two great kids. Here goes my list in no particular order.

I wish I would have known…

1. to always keep God my number one priority. Some of us mistakenly put our children in this position that is reserved for our God, whose name is Jealous (Ex. 34:14). He is not jealous of our children, He is jealous for us because He loves us with such passion. A household that gets out of order with this is not pleasing to God.

2. how much influence my personal habits have on my children. My husband always claims that all our kids’ good habits come from him and all of their bad habits come from me (of course, he is kidding). However, I can so easily see the good and bad habits they have picked up from me. Had I known this 21 years ago, I would have tried to change some of those habits.

3. how much laundry two kids can produce! I mean, come on, there has not been a day (except a Sabbath here and there) that my husband or I have not washed at least 2 loads a day. It is a never ending activity in my house.

4. that I would not be able to have anything “nice” until the kids are out on their own. We have a 17 year old daughter and a 20 year old son and I love them beyond words. But, as the old saying goes, “You can’t have nothin’ for dogs and kids!”

5. how to tell the difference when they need extra attention and love or just a good old spanking! There is an art in knowing the difference. Err on the side of extra attention and love if you are ever in doubt.

6. how to discipline in love instead of out of anger. I always think of Patsy Clairmont’s story of how she headed for one of her boys like a locomotive one day. All she had on her mind was “get the kid, get the kid”. When he saw her coming, he said “Mom, let’s pray!” Her son had quickly learned that mom was a lot more level headed when they prayed before the discipline came!

7. to always honor the children’s father in their presence. If you disagree with your husband concerning discipline or a decision, always have a private discussion with him. Don’t ever undermine his God-given place of authority (not dictatorship) in front of the children.

8. to give my children my complete attention for longer periods of time. I am afraid too many times, I made my sweet babies feel like more of an imposition than a blessing.

9. to say “no” to time-stealing activities. This includes some activities like sports or lessons of some sort. Kids can get just as stressed out as we do when they are over-scheduled.

10. to relish every sweet moment because, before you know it, your babies will be gone in a blink!

So this is my top 10 list of things I wish I had known. As mothers, we face a ton of guilt for the things we did wrong. But remember, that God can take ashes and make beauty. Matthew 5:48 tells us “Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Before you get all panicky, the word perfect is not exactly what you think. It is the Greek word “teleios” which means complete. When taken in context, this verse is referring to loving others. We are never more like God than when we are loving others. Love your family to the best of your ability and let God take care of the rest.